Wednesday, February 6, 2013

How I Lost My Ability to Function as a Normal Adult

I *know* there are more instances than this that point to my endearing quirks (or debilitating character flaws, whichever one you want to call it), but here is one, written out especially for your enjoyment.

Once when I was little, probably 9 or 7 or 10, I woke up in the middle of the night and threw up.  I don't know why I was randomly sick in the middle of that fateful night, but it marked a significant turning point in my young life.  After I got sick, I leaned my neck forward and found that it was kind of cramped up.  I told my mom that and within ten minutes we went to the hospital in fear of meningitis (I think that's what we were worried about, anyways....).

Truthfully, I don't remember a lot of the details between leaving for the hospital and what I'm about to describe next.  It doesn't matter.  What matters is what I'm about to describe next.

Next: The doctors needed a blood sample from me for testing.  What the--!?  Ahhhh aaaayyychHHH to the NO!  There was no way in hot Hades I was going to let them and their little blood-sucking needles near my young 9 or 7 or 10 year-old veins.  I went down with a fight.  I put up an embarrassingly HUGE hissy fit...and they had to call in back up.  No, seriously.  The nurses called for this  very large scary burly man with a butch haircut--to pin me down.  He and another nurse had to LAY their bodies on me to get this stupid blood sample, all the while I was fuh-REAKING out of my mind.  It was a disaster.

After being sufficiently traumatized, I received the sternest talking-to of my life.  I'll never forget how embarrassing I was to my mom or how embarrassed I was of myself.  Nevertheless, I digress.  The more important fact here is that I can't even take shots now without having some sort of minor freak out, even if it is just in my head (the freak out, not the shot).  I haven't had a flu shot since I've left home because...no one is here to make me.  Shots aren't as bad as blood samples, however.  Recently I had to give a blood sample at the doctor's office, and I was about THIS close to breaking down and crying.  (My mom can attest to this.)  I told the nurse that I am deathly afraid of needles and couldn't look.  This is the kicker: she asked me how old I was.  I had to tell her that I'm 21, yes, I know I'm too old to be freaking out...

This whole needle phobia isn't the only thing that developed from this story, however.  The experience of waking up randomly to throw up also completely scarred me.  For who knows how long (my parents know probably) after this, I couldn't go to sleep without having my parents reassure me that I wasn't going to wake up in the middle of the night to puke my guts up again.  Apparently (they told me this later), this excessive worrying almost got to the point where they considering taking me to therapy.  Yeah...

So.  Now you know why I 1) can't handle needles and 2) have very big issues with throwing up.

I don't know what I'm going to do in physiology lab this semester when we have to sample our own blood... 

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